Where to start....?

The day hasn't dawned yet, and I'm growing in doubt that it ever will. The 'salvation' I've been looking to replace since the innocence of knowing that when I die I will be with Jesus has failed. I am 26. It's been 8 years or so. It's over. New part, new phrase.
Drugs.
Music.
Fucking.
Being angry, being alone.
Addictions. hopeless, but addictions. i am here. i know, Eckhart, I know. Be here, everything else is a distracting concept that robs you of the freedom. I wish I could focus more.
battle for truth like you battle for air.
enough.
many
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